A Ride Through Silence

Posted on | July 5, 2012 | No Comments

Yes, I am ad-libbing Pink Floyd’s Coming Back To Life here, but it does seem apt, considering how long I’ve been AWOL, and well, I am trying to crawl my way back to writing. It’s not that I haven’t been reading – I have! It’s just – I’m struggling with writing at this point in time. Stringing together two sentences is so much effort, and every time I re-read what I’ve written, it makes me want to ‘Select All’ and ‘Delete’. It’s rubbish.

I have half a dozen or so posts sitting in ‘Drafts’ waiting to be re-worked, proof read, and deleted so that no one will witness my oh-so-cringeworthy writing. I can’t really attribute this to writer’s block, but I think it’s something to do with a hundred things running through my head as I try to write, instead of a clean slate.

A friend sent me this article yesterday, and I can’t help but wonder if that’s where I am stuck – the so-called “busy trap”. Life’s too short to work this hard, life’s too short to be this busy, but yet – the completely batty, crazy and unreasonable person in me refuses to acknowledge this. It’s like talking to an out and out idiot. When I was unwell a couple of years ago, I decided that it was okay to indulge the neurotic OCD half of my personality, who really did suffer during those few months. I think, possibly, that needs to change. Or stop. Life, as I know it, is getting ridiculous.

I guess that’s part of the reason why I read The Fountainhead again. It’s a book I can ramble on about. Just mention Roark’s name to me, and off I go! It’s awesome. Amazing. And a bit nostalgic, for reading that book always takes me back to the fourteen year old me.

Anyhoo, I am going to try and blog more, but please have patience, and don’t judge me for not being able to string sentences together. I’ll get there eventually. All I need is a little time, and well, that’s it really.

Lost in thought and lost in time
While the seeds of life and the seeds of change were planted
Outside the rain fell dark and slow
While I pondered on this dangerous but irresistible pastime
I took a heavenly ride through our silence
I knew the moment had arrived
For killing the past and coming back to life

I took a heavenly ride through our silence
I knew the waiting had begun
And headed straight..into the shining sun

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